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Similarly, you want to position yourself so you’re open to the center of the room.If your back is to the people around you – you’re facing the bar, you’ve sequestered yourself in a corner somewhere – you’re putting up yet another barrier that makes you less approachable; someone who’s .There is a great deal of social programming that warns women against being “that girl” – the pushy, clingy or “desperate” guy-chaser who drives men away, and there are many men who react badly to women who are “too forward”. but Look, there’s no getting around this: if you want to be the sort of guy that women approach, you have to put some effort into your appearance.You don’t have to look like Michael Ealy or Ian Sommerhalder, but if you’re looking like you rolled out of bed and into whatever happened to be on the floor around you, women aren’t going to be inclined to linger in your presence no matter how hot you are or aren’t.Averting your eyes or avoiding eye contact tells people that you want to talk to them and will make people avoid you instead.Want to let women know it’s OK to come talk to you?
Give her a more visible sign – guys giving the eyebrow flash is a long-recognized sign of interest, as is a nod that yes, you see her and you’re open to talking. There will also be plenty of times when you may want to be slightly more direct and give a head nod indicating that she should come over. But now you’re aware you’re verging into creeper territory, so you walk a way and hope to catch her later… but deliberately separating yourself from everybody gives her an opportunity to come up to you when she doesn’t feel like she has to work up even yourself.Plus, the guy glowering in the corner is going to seem far more intimidating and judgmental than the one laughing and having fun with his friends – another thing that makes women less likely to approach.This doesn’t mean that you need to be an extrovert in order to be approachable; introverts are just as capable of indicating that they’re enjoying themselves, even if it means they’re in a smaller group or positioned away from the main crowd.Despite the fact that approach is actually one of the least important parts of dating, it usually remains one of the most terrifying for many men.Lots of guys, especially guys who are shy, suffer from approach anxiety, or who are socially inexperienced, dread approaching women the way I dread the hooded figures from the the dog park Many men wish that women would make things easier by being willing to take the initiative themselves.
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As I’ve said before: there’s being good looking, and then there’s being attractive.